What Languages to Hate
Dear lisp comrades and other concerned parties,
First, all languages have equal rights. Do not belittle other languages just because YOUR favorite language is a bit better in this aspect or that. Different people have different ideas and manners of perception. Ideas compete and thrive in all unexpected fashions. Societies improve, inventions progress. Lisp may be a first in this or that, or faster or flexibler, or higher level than other languages old and new, but then there are other languages the likes of Mathematica and Haskell and Dylan et al which ridicule lisps in the same way lisp ridicule other languages.
Just because YOU are used to more functional programing or love lots of parenthesis doesn't mean they are the only and best concepts. The so-called Object Oriented programing of Java fame, or the visual programing of Visual Basic fame, or the logic programing of Prolog fame, or the format-stable syntax of Python fame, or the “one line of Mathematica equals ten thousand lines of lisp” of A New Kind of Science fame … all are parts of healthy competing concepts, paradigms, or directions of growth.
The way some of you deride other languages is like sneering heterogeneousness. If unchecked, soon you'll only have your sister to marry to. Cute, but you do not want incest to become the only sex. Next time your superiority complex makes you sneer at non-lisp or newfangled languages, remember this. It is diversity of ideas, that drive the welfare of progress.
Now, there is one judgmental criterion, that if a language or computer technology fits it, then we not only should castigate at their missionaries, but persecute and harass the language to the harshest death. That is: utter sloppiness, irresponsibility, and lies. These things are often borne out of some student's homework or moron's dirty-work, harbored by “free” and wanton lies and personal fame, amassed thru ignorance.
Of my short but diligent industrial unix computing experience since 1998, i have identified the following targets:
- C (and consequences like csh, C++)
- unix, unixism, and things grown out of unix. (languages, protocols, philosophies, expectations, movements)
In our software industry, i like to define criminals as those who cause inordinate harm to society, not necessarily directly. Of the above things, some of their authors are not such criminals or are forgivable. While others, are hypocritical fantastic liers selfish to the core. When dealing with these self-promoting jolly lying humble humorous priests and their insidious superficially-harmless speeches, there should be no benefit of doubt. Tell them directly to stop their vicious lies. Do a face-off.
As to their brain-washed followers for example the not-yet-hard-core unix, C, or Perl coders rampant in industry, try to snap them out of it. This you do by loudly snapping fingers in front of their face, making it sound like a ear piercing bang. Explain to them the utter stupidity of the things they are using, and the harm to their brain. IMPORTANT: _teach_, not _debate_ or _discuss_ or falling back into your philosophical deliberating indecisiveness. I've seen enough criticisms among learned programers or academicians on these, so i know you know what i'm talking about. When you see a unixer brainwashed beyond saving, kick him out of the door. He has became a zombie who cannot be helped.
There are other languages or technology, by itself technically are perhaps mediocre but at least is not a egregious irresponsible hack, therefore does not deserve scorn, but sometimes it comes with overwhelming popular outrageous lies (euphemized as hype). Java is a example. For this reason, it is equally deserving the harshest treatment. Any loud proponents of such should be immediately slapped in the mouth and kicked in the ass in no ambiguous ways.
Summary: all languages have equal rights. However, those utterly SLOPPY and IRRESPONSIBLE HACKS with promoter's LIES should be severely punished. It is these, that cause computing industry inordinate harm. Meanwhile, it is wrong to haughtily criticize other languages just because they are not your cup of tea. Now, please remember this and go do society good.